Classic Pamela Positive: Communicate With More Than Words

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It is so amazing to me that when we communicate, the words really ‘come in third place.’

What’s first and second? First is the tone. If we are abrasive, affrontive, sarcastic then it doesn’t open up the conversation and action for change.

Calm, proactive, inclusive, even — “slow” — conversations help provide dynamic change.

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It sounds as if it is an oxymoron. But allowing the participants to breathe in the interaction helps bring about the best and most inclusive solutions for all parties.

Second then is body language and what we communicate; third come the words.

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The Classic Pamela Positive: Should Our Work Make Us Happy?

I find that so much of what is true ‘happiness’ in one’s job is how we conduct ourselves and our thinking.

For example, even if your job isn’t your exact ideal, there are elements that can bring full happiness. Being of service is not relegated to any one sector. Being professional, kind, courteous, and with a high “client service” attitude to external parties as well as to the internal team, can bring high “happiness” value.

Ideally, it should be coupled with sincere appreciation in return.  Regardless, it makes us feel happy to deliver sincere value. We hold a “high happiness quotient” in our own esteem for ourselves and how we are serving.

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On the larger scale of trying to find something you love to do—I do think each person has a wonderful contribution in life and is here for a reason. That doesn’t mean you don’t have to search for it. Part of the searching makes us who we are; hones our goals; and positively affects others along the way… Life is not just an end game of finding the one job which makes you happy. You are evolving, and your happiness, and therefore growth, is also evolving.

Why Certain People Are In Your Life

bikeThese words have been inspiring to me, and I am glad to share them with you.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.  When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly.  They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.  They may seem like a godsend, and they are.  They are there for the reason you need them to be.

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Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.  Sometimes they die.  Sometimes they walk away.  Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand.  What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.  The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.  They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.  They may teach you something you have never done.  They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.  Believe it!  It is real!  But, only for a season.

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LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.  Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person (any way); and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.  It is said that love is blind, but friendship is clairvoyant.

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The Pamela Positive: Make Criticism Yield to You

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Today Matters — by John Maxwell

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Team, today matters. Inspirational Leader John Maxwell outlines our pathway to success:

Today Matters. 12 Daily Disciplines to Guarantee Success

  1. Choose and display the right attitude
  2. Determine and act on important priorities
  3. Know and follow healthy guidelines
  4. Communicate with and care for your family
  5. Practice and develop good thinking
  6. Make and keep proper commitments
  7. Make and properly manage your money
  8. Deepen and live out your spiritual faith
  9. Initiate and invest in solid personal relationships
  10. Plan for and model being generosity
  11. Seek out and embrace personal improvements
Today matters, team.  We don’t take a day for granted. Live it with meaning, purpose and joy.
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John C. Maxwell is an American author and leadership expert. His books–especially the 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, have sold millions of copies and have even landed him on the New York Time’s Bestseller List. Born in 1947 to an evangelical family in Garden City, Michigan, Maxwell was exposed to a religious lifestyle from a young age. He served as a senior pastor at Skyline Church for 14 years, but in 1995, he decided to devote his efforts full-time to writing and speaking. It was then that Maxwell began to think deeply about leadership.
He founded INJOY, Maximum Impact, the John Maxwell Team, ISS, and EQUIP. EQUIP is an international leadership development organization that works to develop leaders; in fact, it is involved with leaders from over 80 nations. Its mission is to “see effective leaders fulfill the Great Commission in every nation,” the Great Commission being a tenet of Christianity about the instructions of Jesus Christ. Maxwell speaks to Fortune 500 companies, international organizations, and even the United States Military Academy about effective leadership strategies. Notably, he was one of the 25 authors named to Amazon’s 10th Anniversary Hall of Fame. In 2014, he was Inc. Magazine’s #1 leadership and management expert in the world.

Uplifted In The Process

“One makes a gift of one’s life and endeavors by sanctifying it with love, and devotion and selfless service. When seeking to uplift others, we are uplifted in the process. Every kind thought or smile therefore benefits oneself as well as all the world.” – David Hawkins

How much we have to learn from David Hawkins’s beautiful consciousness!

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How exciting life is when you view it from his vantage point. Whether it’s at our job, walking on the street, parking our car, greeting the mailman, we have a divine calling to help the world.

Everyone can do this. Everyone can find a way to help, whether it’s formal or informal. You might be a great, superlative volunteer! You might equally give a lot to the world simply by smiling and greeting every person with positivity, joy, and love. Let’s say you meet three new people each day.  You treat each person with intentional love, joy, care. If you do this 365 days a year and live to be 78.3 years, we will meet 80,000 people in our lifetime. That means you have a huge chance to make a difference in someone’s life.

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Now, what’s so exciting about this is how it uplifts ourselves. Of course, our heart is lifted when you joyfully greet another. Your spirits are buoyed when you acknowledge someone’s presence or give them an encouraging word. This is about your spiritual health.

So even if you’re without a job right now, or in a job that is extremely stressful and negative, you still have an incredible impact on the world.

Don’t believe it? Look at the studies. According to a 20-year study in 2007 study by the Harvard School of Public Health, “optimism cuts the risk of coronary heart disease by half.” That’s great news in general, and great news for your health!  

Each day you can treat another person lovingly.  As you love, you build your own joyful attitude, your own self-esteem, and your own positive attitude. That will transform your neighbor, it will transform your community, and it will change the world, and yes, it will change you.

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Contribute to your spiritual health and the health of the world today. You don’t have to wait!

Lovingly,

Pamela

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Born in 1927, Dr. David Hawkins (M.D., Ph.D.) was raised in a strict Episcopalian home. Beginning in his teens, and continuing as he joined the Navy for World War II, he developed a strong taste for alcohol and struggled with alcoholism. After obtaining a medical degree from Medical College of Wisconsin, in the 1960s to 1970s, he founded the North Nassau Clinic for the lower middle class, treating thousands of alcohol- and drug-addicted individuals. By the time of his death in 2012, he had experienced success as a psychiatrist, battled over 25 illnesses or health conditions, wrestled with skepticism and atheism, then discovered Zen Buddhism and became spiritually “enlightened.”

Dr. Hawkins was a nationally-renowned, award-winning spiritual leader and lecturer, researcher, physician, psychiatrist—as well as author of over a dozen books. His research includes pioneering the “Map of Consciousness,” which provided a scientific framework for outlining spiritual matters.

 

It’s Okay To Be Second

Is Steph Curry in second place?

He’s got the NBA record for 3-pointers in a season of 402.


(Photo: USA Today)

He’s a two-time NBA champion and League MVP.


(Ezra Shaw—Getty Images)

That’s pretty impressive—that doesn’t sound like #2!

But here’s where he’s second.

  • 1,108 career steals, which is second place in the Golden Warriors’ record.
  • 4,226 assists—again, second place in the Warriors’ history

Those stats are amazing! They are something to be very proud of.   

So realize in life, there are several ways you might be measured.

In basketball, it might be assists, free throws, three-pointers, steals.

In your profession, it might be the number of new sales deals, EQ, loyalty, how you contribute to the team as a whole.

In life, it might be how often you are punctual, how you treat your husband, how kind you are to people on the street, how you treat your life coach, how much you watch out for your family’s stability, the ways you give back, ways you help your community.

There are a lot of ways that we need to “show up” in life.  In some of those areas, we might be trying really hard, and coming in second.

What do you do? Well, that is actually perfectly fine.

We are not the number one player in everything in Life.  

In not everything do do we achieve A+ or the top mark.

That gives room for all people to succeed. Everyone has different fortes.

We should cherish each person’s ability to shine.

As we are trying hard and doing our best — and doing 10 different things in life — it’s more than okay to reach second place!

Be grateful for all the good you’re doing, be grateful for the opportunity to do good, and also, celebrate the number one, the number three, four, five, six, seven… you get it. 🙂 Everyone has a right place, in each activity.

(Statistics from San Francisco Chronicle, March 11, 2018).