Tag Archives: family

The Classic Pamela Positive: Celebrate True Wealth

 

Wealth is a state of mind and life. We tend to associate poverty with money. But poverty can be mental, emotional or Spiritual Poverty. I am often struck by this in my travel and volunteering in developing nations. Often, the divorce rates are low. Families not only stay together, but also spend time together. They gather food from the fields together, cook together and share meals together.

 

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Contrast us: 15 minute family dinners if we are lucky. Fast-food and food distanced from its natural base. We eat alone; we eat in our cars. Divorces are easier to get, and in our mind it can be easier to allow those thoughts in as a possibility, rather than work through critical issues. So we lose the connection to family. We lose the connection to the local farm. We can lose the connection to long-term commitment.

 

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We lose our greatest asset in natural wealth: relationships. Relationships with ourselves, our families, the earth. This wealth creates happy, balanced, productive, lower stress lifestyles, because we are connected in the way we are meant to be.

Further, we often pass by our heritage and where we come from. In many emerging nations, and especially in the continent of Africa, we see tribes value their connection to their heritage as primary importance even above their nationality. There is a deep-rooted connection to rituals and history which keeps people grounded in who they are, and the deeper, long-term meaning of being a part of a larger community in their lives.

 

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Poverty is about money, at times. It has to be addressed as people should have the opportunity to live productive lives and make choices about what they would like to devote their lives to. Poverty is also about our well-being. Often when we get beyond “money poverty,” we forget “well-being poverty,” and get trapped in a go-go-go consumer culture.

 

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I hope we can celebrate the healthy wealth that is accessible to us all in positive, committed relationships with ourselves, one another, our families, our earth, our communities and our heritage. How wonderful this is available to us all.


Fig. 1: Photo by Lee Myungseon on Unsplash  Fig. 2: Photo by Sai De Silva on Usnplash
Fig. 3: Photo by Ramdan Authentic on Unsplash  Fig. 4: Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “All the Other Things We Think Make Us Happy Are Actually Just Ways of Getting More Family and Friends.” – Daniel Todd Gilbert

 

“We are happy when we have family, we are happy when we have friends and almost all the other things we think make us happy are actually just ways of getting more family and friends.”

– Daniel Todd Gilbert

 

Woman Falling In Line Holding Each Other

 

Let’s be grateful for all the happiness in our lives today. To truly cherish family, call a long-lost friend, or spend less time on work — and more time on someone.  

All the ‘someones’ in our lives are what give us joy. Appreciate!

Love,

Pamela

 


Daniel Todd Gilbert (born November 5, 1957) is Professor of Psychology at Harvard University. He is a social psychologist known for his research (with Timothy Wilson of the University of Virginia) on affective forecasting, with a special emphasis on cognitive biases such as the impact bias. Gilbert authored Stumbling on Happiness, which won the 2007 Royal Society Prizes for Science Books, adding to his list of numerous awards for his teaching and research. A high school dropout at age 19, he aspired to be a science fiction writer but when a creative writing class he wanted to take was full he took up psychology instead at University of Colorado Denver and Princeton University. He also wrote essays that appeared in The New York Times and TIME, among others, and penned short stories that were published in Amazing Stories, Isaac Asimov’s Science Fiction Magazine and many other magazines and anthologies. He is the co-writer and host of the NOVA television series This Emotional Life. He and his wife Marilynn Oliphant live in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

Bio Source: Wikipedia


Fig¹.  Photo by mentatdgt on Pixeles 

The Classic Pamela Positive: “Shame on You, Aunt Pamela, That’s a TREE.”

 

“Shame on you, Aunt Pamela, that’s a TREE. We can’t hurt the trees!”

 

A few years ago, my niece Lindsey gave me a great talking to. She was 5 or 6 and needed help in the restroom, so off we went. As we finished up, I pulled two paper towels to dry my hands.

 

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“Shame on you, Aunt Pamela. That’s a tree! We can’t hurt the trees!”

I asked her where she learned that important lesson.

“In school. They teach us paper comes from trees, and we need to keep our trees.”

Anyone who doesn’t have hope for our future should rethink. What a wonderful opening our world is facing where we teach elementary kids the connection between paper and our living trees…to be conscious of conserving, so that Lindsey and others grow up with conservation being a natural part of their lives.

There is a new standard of living being created, and not only our youth, but our elementary school children, are leading the way.

 


Fig¹. Photo by David Vig on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “Ignorance of Certain Subjects Is a Great Part of Wisdom.”

 

“Ignorance of certain subjects is a great part of wisdom.”

–Hugo de Groot

Ignorance is Good.

How can ignorance be good? But it is good to ignore certain things, such as ignorance of gossip. We can also ignore unnecessary negative thoughts. Other things to ignore include self-doubting thoughts and unhelpful suggestions. A lot of these thoughts are just not true…. and you don’t have to accept them as part of your normal experience.

 

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We all go through a tough day. Yet we need to defend our thoughts, and therefore our life.

Our life is based upon our thought. What you think will come through to fruition… It does not mean we ignore life lessons or a candid talk with ourselves; and at times, gently with others. It does not mean everything is perfect.

 

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But in general, we pursue being, doing and recognizing good. This will build a positive life, a positive day and positive relationships

So let’s do a good job of ignoring! We need to let go of the negative view of life. Don’t buy into the outside gossip or inner gossip.

Watch your thoughts, keep them positive and watch your life grow in joy.

I’m Ignoring the Wrong Suggestion,

Pamela

 


Hugo de Groot (1583-1645), also called Hugo Grotius, was a philosopher and a theologian, and worked as a jurist in the Dutch Republic. He was extremely influential in the creation of international law. He wrote a number of books, including On the Law of War and Peace, addressing subjects such as just wars and rules to govern conflict. His overall purpose was to urge restraint in rushing to war, and to urge reasonable conduct once war was engaged. In 1608 he married Maria van Reigersberch, with whom he would have eight children (four surviving beyond youth) and who would be invaluable in helping him and the family to weather the storm to come.

Bio Source: Wikipedia, The Famous   Fig¹.  Photo by Drew Coffman on Unsplash  Fig².  Photo by Yolanda Sun on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “Civility Is The Behavior That Marks…Share Common, Public, and Political Space” – Daniel Mendelsohn

 

“Civility is the behavior that marks mutual acknowledgement that we individuals share common, public, and political space. Think about the platforms through which you interact with people all day, the media that we call social, but if anything, have enhanced our ability to be asocial.

To screen every element of society, culture and politics that doesn’t suit or flatter or soothe us; thereby, removing the necessity for civility in the first place.”

―Daniel Mendelsohn

 

Graciousness, goodness, civility—all of this helps us to maintain a sense of calm and peace. Did you know anxiety is one of the most prevalent challenges we face in the U.S.? Nearly one 1/5 of our population experiences it. Yet only 1/3 try to find help.1 They are hurting… and continue to hurt. 

 

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Where do we think this anxiety is coming from? First, it’s coming from disconnectedness. We aren’t really getting the nurturance and love that we need from one-on-one interactions. And those interactions need to be with people we don’t know, and with people we do.

With people we do know, we build upon positive loving actions that make them become habit and security. With people we don’t know, it enforces the need to extend ourselves, to spread love and to give back. Both are essential.

 

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If we want more civility, that means that we need to slow down. If we want more civility, that means less screen time. If we want more civility, that means that we care and express our love for more people. It’s that simple. And who doesn’t want to love more? So let’s try.

May you live a civil day today, may you live it with care for everyone in every word that you give out, in every touch, and every comment that you make. And in every thought, so that in our minds and in our actions, civility becomes the natural way again.

 

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How we all long for graciousness and civility!

With Graciousness,

Pamela

 


Daniel Mendelsohn is a classist, writer, and critic. A graduate of Princeton’s graduate school, he published work on Euripidean tragedy before he went on to become a contributor to publications such as The New York TimesOutThe Nation and more. He was born in Long Island and raised in Old Bethage, New York. He received his undergraduate degree at the University of Virginia in Classics. He writes reviews on books, films, theater and television. He has won Princeton University’s James Madison Medal in 2018, American Philological Association President’s Award for service to the Classics in 2014 and the American Academy of Arts and Letters award for Prose Style in 2014. Currently, he is a professor at Bard College. He is also the director of the Robert B. Silvers Foundation, which supports writers. In his free time, Mendelsohn enjoys watching television and going to the movie theater. He has two children and four siblings, including a brother who is a film director, another brother who is a photographer and a sister who is a journalist.

Bio Source: Wikipedia, Daniel Mendelsohn Official Website


Citations:

1 “Facts & Statistics”, Anxiety and Depression Association of America, https://adaa.org/about-adaa/press-room/facts-statistics

Fig¹.  Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash

Fig². Photo by Kira auf der Heide on Unsplash

Fig³. Photo by Naassom Azevedo on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “Not As An Emblem Of Suffering…But As An Example Of Faithfulness” -Mennonite Phrase

 

“Not as an emblem of suffering, but as an example of faithfulness in the midst of suffering. Job never doubted God.”

―Mennonite Phrase

 

We are faithful in anything in life ― our work, our family, our duties, not simply to do it. We do it because we cherish the values they represent, or, it supports the people we love.

 

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We go to work because we are impassioned by it and how we can make the world better, whether you are an international diplomat or a garbage man who helps keep our streets and health safe. We are faithful to cherish others, such as showing up for our grandson’s game or niece’s game, because we love them and want to nurture that love. Most importantly, we have faith in God because we trust that He/She has the best plan for us. So if we love our work and love our families, shouldn’t we love an all Powerful God the most?

 

Being Grateful to a Great God,

Pamela

 


The Mennonites are a group of Christian Anabaptists named after Menno Simons (1496–1561). His teachings were a relatively minor influence on the group, though. They are of the historic peace churches. Mennonites are committed to nonviolence, nonviolent resistance/reconciliation, and pacifism. There are about 1.5 million Mennonites worldwide as of 2006. There are many different types of Mennonite communities in the world. There are those that dress in old-fashioned ways, and others which are hard to tell apart from other people leading a modern lifestyle. Most Mennonites are in the United States and Democratic Republic of Congo, but Mennonites can also be found in tight-knit communities in at least 51 countries on six continents or scattered amongst the populace of those countries.

Mennonites have an international distinction among Christian denominations in disaster relief. They also place a strong theological emphasis on voluntary service. Mennonite Disaster Service, based in North America, provides both immediate and long-term responses to hurricanes, floods, and other disasters. Mennonite Central Committee provides disaster relief around the world alongside their long-term international development programs. Other programs offer a variety of relief efforts and services throughout the world.  In the last few decades some Mennonite groups have also become more actively involved with peace and social justice issues, helping to found Christian Peacemaker Teams and Mennonite Conciliation Service.

Bio Source: Wikipedia


Fig¹.  Photo by Helena Lopes on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: To Have a Positive Mindset: Think about Building your Mind as you would your Dream Home

 

 

When you build a home, you have to have a vision. A vision of what you would like to create.  If you have a negative vision of your home then it certainly is not going to become a beautiful home!   So we need to maintain that vision, even when the going gets rough. Even if you run out of brick. Even if the paint color didn’t match the way you wanted it to. Even if you have to fumigate!  Hold the vision, and keep striving for it.

 

 

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So what has helped me during tough times is not just to focus on the positive, but on gratitude. Even in tough times there is something to be grateful for.  If you are having a hard time in sales and partnerships, perhaps you can be grateful you uplifted that potential client’s day with a positive smile or sincere compliment…

 

On an entirely different level… if a natural disaster has occurred, you can still be grateful that the sun came out, as in many countries pollution blocks the sun. That a friend is near. That people are caring and helping.

 

 

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Even in a crisis, and often especially in a crisis, the greatest goodness of people comes out.  We can find the good even when we don’t seem ‘to have or own much.’    True wealth comes from qualities of being loving, kind, sincere, genuine, giving. And how wonderful — that that wealth is available to each one of us, every moment.

 

 


Citations:

Fig¹. David Pisnoy on Unsplash

Fig². Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash