Tag Archives: community

The Classic Pamela Positive: “Civility Is The Behavior That Marks…Share Common, Public, and Political Space” – Daniel Mendelsohn

 

 

“Civility is the behavior that marks mutual acknowledgement that we individuals share common, public, and political space. Think about the platforms through which you interact with people all day, the media that we call social, but if anything, have enhanced our ability to be asocial.

To screen every element of society, culture and politics that doesn’t suit or flatter or soothe us; thereby, removing the necessity for civility in the first place.”

–       Daniel Mendelsohn

 

 

Graciousness, goodness, civility—all of this helps us to maintain a sense of calm and peace. Did you know anxiety is one of the most prevalent challenges we face in the U.S.? Nearly one 1/5 of our population experiences it. Yet only 1/3 try to find help.1 They are hurting… and continue to hurt. 

 

 

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Where do we think this anxiety is coming from? First, it’s coming from disconnectedness. We aren’t really getting the nurturance and love that we need from one-on-one interactions. And those interactions need to be with people we don’t know, and with people we do.

 

With people we do know, we build upon positive loving actions that make them become habit and security. With people we don’t know, it enforces the need to extend ourselves, to spread love and to give back. Both are essential.

 

 

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If we want more civility, that means that we need to slow down. If we want more civility, that means less screen time. If we want more civility, that means that we care and express our love for more people. It’s that simple. And who doesn’t want to love more? So let’s try.

 

May you live a civil day today, may you live it with care for everyone in every word that you give out, in every touch, and every comment that you make. And in every thought, so that in our minds and in our actions, civility becomes the natural way again.

 

 

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How we all long for graciousness and civility!

With Graciousness,

Pamela

 


 

 

Daniel Mendelsohn is a classist, writer, and critic. A graduate of Princeton’s graduate school, he published work on Euripidean tragedy before he went on to become a contributor to publications such as The New York TimesOutThe Nation and more. He was born in Long Island and raised in Old Bethage, New York. He received his undergraduate degree at the University of Virginia in Classics. He writes reviews on books, films, theater and television. He has won Princeton University’s James Madison Medal in 2018, American Philological Association President’s Award for service to the Classics in 2014 and the American Academy of Arts and Letters award for Prose Style in 2014. Currently, he is a professor at Bard College. He is also the director of the Robert B. Silvers Foundation, which supports writers. In his free time, Mendelsohn enjoys watching television and going to the movie theater. He has two children and four siblings, including a brother who is a film director, another brother who is a photographer and a sister who is a journalist.

 

 

The Classic Pamela Positive: Divide and Rule…Unite and Lead

 

He was brilliant, insightful and troubled at times, too… but this is a great quote from Johann Wolfgang von Goethe:

 

“Divide and rule, a sound motto;

unite and lead, a better one.”

 

It’s sad sometimes how, per Goethe’s quote above, we at times need to separate into distinct groups in order to have harmony…but in a close future, the habit will be one of uniting…and so a better you, me, all of us.

 

 


 

 

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832) was a German poet, playwright, novelist, and natural philosopher, best known for his two-part poetic drama Faust, which he started around the age of twenty-three and didn’t finish till shortly before his death sixty years later. He is considered one of the greatest contributors of the German Romantic period. At the age of sixteen, in 1765, Goethe went to Leipzig University to study law as his father wished, though he also gained much recognition from the Rococo poems and lyric he wrote during this period. In 1766 he fell in love with Anne Catharina Schoenkopf (1746-1810) and wrote his joyfully exuberant collection of poems Annette.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe now rests in the Fürstengruft or “Royal Tomb” in the “Historic Cemetery” in Wiemar where his dear friend Schiller is also laid to rest. In honour of these two famous German men of letters, a statue of Goethe and Schiller now stands at the German National Theatre in Munich. UNESCO’S “Memory of the World” list includes the handwritten works of Goethe preserved by the Goethe-Schiller-Archive.

Bio Source: The Literature Network

The Classic Pamela Positive: What Love Is

 

What Love Is

 

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It’s the warmth of your eyes.

It’s the feeling in your heart.

It’s the slowing down to care.

 

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It’s connecting.

 

It’s giving.

 

And you can do it right now. Go reach out to someone and give them your love.

 

Love Today,

 

Pamela

 

 

Citations:
Fig. 1: Photo by Roman Kraft on Unsplash
Fig. 2: Photo by Ryan Holloway on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “A Selfless Person Is More Concerned About the Happiness of Another…”

 

“A selfless person is one who is more concerned about the happiness and well-being of another than about his or her own convenience or comfort, one who is willing to serve another when it is neither sought for nor appreciated, or one who is willing to serve even those whom he or she dislikes.

A selfless person displays a willingness to sacrifice, a willingness to purge from his or her mind and heart personal wants, and needs, and feelings. Instead of reaching for and requiring praise and recognition for himself, or gratification of his or her own wants, the selfless person will meet these very human needs for others. ”

–H. Burke Peterson

 

 

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What a great lesson to learn today, team Living and Giving. You need
to think about how you can think about others. 

We all have a tendency to think about our lives, our pathway, our job,
our marriage, our date, our dog, our, our, OUR!

Get off yourself and on to serving others.   You will feel an
indescribable joy, and, relief!  Life is not just about you. Start
living… for others.

I love you,
Pamela


 

 

H. Burke Peterson was an authority in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and the author of “A Glimpse of Glory”. He was born in Salt Lake City, Utah and grew up in Phoenix, Arizona. In World War II, he fought with the American Navy in the Pacific theatre.  After the war, he attended the University of Arizona and went on to receive his masters at the Utah State Agricultural College. Throughout his time serving in the church, he was published in The Ensign of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which is the official periodical of the Church, numerous times He was married to Brookie Carden in 1947, and they had five daughters.

The Classic Pamela Positive: “Spending Time with People You Love and Who Love You”

“It is only a slight exaggeration to say that happiness is the experience of spending time with people you love and who love you.”

 –Daniel Kahneman, Nobel Laureate

 

Gifts and giving.  We associate so much of that with happiness.  Yet our one true Happiness is Loving Others. 

 

 

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Oh, that sweet presence to just be around those we cherish and feel at home with!

 

 


 

 

Daniel Kahneman is an Israeli-American psychologist and Nobel laureate.  He is known for his work in the psychology of decision-making.  He was born in Tel Aviv, spent his childhood in France, and moved to Israel in the late 1940s.  He studied psychology at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem, and began his career as a lecturer there.  Kahneman has published extensively in psychology, and received the Nobel Memorial Prize in Economics in 2002 for his work on prospect theory.  He is currently on the faculty at Princeton.

The Classic Pamela Positive: Celebrate True Wealth

 

Wealth is a state of mind and life. We tend to associate poverty with money. But poverty can be mental, emotional or Spiritual Poverty.™ I am often struck by this in my travel and volunteering in developing nations. Often, the divorce rates are low. Families not only stay together, but also spend time together. They gather food from the fields together, cook together and share meals together.

 

 

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Contrast us: 15 minute family dinners if we are lucky. Fast-food and food distanced from its natural base. We eat alone; we eat in our cars. Divorces are easier to get, and in our mind it can be easier to allow those thoughts in as a possibility, rather than work through critical issues. So we lose the connection to family. We lose the connection to the local farm. We can lose the connection to long-term commitment.

 

 

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We lose our greatest asset in natural wealth: relationships. Relationships with ourselves, our families, the earth. This wealth creates happy, balanced, productive, lower stress lifestyles, because we are connected in the way we are meant to be.

Further, we often pass by our heritage and where we come from. In many emerging nations, and especially in the continent of Africa, we see tribes value their connection to their heritage as primary importance even above their nationality. There is a deep-rooted connection to rituals and history which keeps people grounded in who they are, and the deeper, long-term meaning of being a part of a larger community in their lives.

 

 

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Poverty is about money, at times. It has to be addressed as people should have the opportunity to live productive lives and make choices about what they would like to devote their lives to. Poverty is also about our well-being. Often when we get beyond “money poverty,” we forget “well-being poverty,” and get trapped in a go-go-go consumer culture.

 

 

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I hope we can celebrate the healthy wealth that is accessible to us all in positive, committed relationships with ourselves, one another, our families, our earth, our communities and our heritage. How wonderful this is available to us all.

 

 


Citations:
Fig. 1: Photo by Lee Myungseon on Unsplash
Fig. 2: Photo by Sai De Silva on Usnplash
Fig. 3: Photo by Ramdan Authentic on Unsplash
Fig. 4: Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: Why You Should Sit By An Older Man

 

Now that might sound funny, but the other day I felt called to sit by an older man.

We were at a community gathering, celebrating an organist for all her church music. 

She had performed beautifully over many years and she was a lovely person. We had contributed goodies and a potluck, and a celebratory cake. People were laughing, chatting and sharing memories. It was a wonderful sense of togetherness, that we often miss in our social media society.

 

 

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But on the couch was an older man. He didn’t look down, he didn’t look up, he was just sitting there. I asked a friend who he was.

 

“He’s the father of one of our members here, and he’s blind.”

 

I thought what that must feel like.

He’s in a sea of people and conversation….and no one’s talking to him…..

yet he hears everything.

It must be a big loud jumble… but nothing specifically directed towards him…… My heart went out to him.

 

 

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I went right away over to the couch and sat down with him. I held his hand and said,

 

“I’m Pamela! Who are you? Are you having a nice day?”

 

His eyes perked up and he continued to look ahead. His face crinkled with a smile. He proceeded to tell me, with very joyous terms, about who he was, his life, and fascinating stories of history. He remembered the time when the Korean War was mentioned in school as well as when World War II was being announced. What prolific, historical events to be a youngster and to hear this global and national news. So monumental, so devastating.

 

 

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He had many fascinating stories to tell about his childhood, about the importance of his aunt, his mom’s sister, and how devoted she was to church and community.

I listened, listened, listened.

We had such a joyous time.

Having our quiet time of sharing, amidst a joyous gathering.

In our lives, that’s all that really needs to be done is to listen, listen, listen, listen with love, listen with your heart.

Everyone has a story. Everyone has a story to tell. And so we listen.

 

 

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What yours? If you want your story to be heard, if you want to be known… then take some time to listen. Take time to listen to someone else’s story. You will learn; they will love you for it. You both will be enriched and, in this case, a blind man’s eyes opened my blind eyes.

I want to hear your story,

Pamela

 

 


Citations:
Fig. 1: Photo by Huy Phan on Unsplash
Fig. 2: Photo by Rhand Mccoy on Unsplash
Fig. 3: Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash
Fig. 4: Photo by Alex Holyoake on Unsplash
Fig. 5: Photo by Mimi Thian on Unsplash