Tag Archives: positive

The Classic Pamela Positive: Communicate With More Than Words

 

It is so amazing to me that when we communicate, the words really ‘come in third place.’

What’s first and second?

 

three woman sitting on table while talking

 

First is the tone. If we are abrasive, affrontive, sarcastic then it doesn’t open up the conversation and action for change.

Calm, proactive, inclusive, even — “slow” — conversations help provide dynamic change. It sounds as if it is an oxymoron. But allowing the participants to breathe in the interaction helps bring about the best and most inclusive solutions for all parties.

 

Photograph of Men Having Conversation Seating on Chair

 

Second then is body language. If our body is open, or hunched over, our shoulders upright or slumped, communicates a world of information! And yes, most significantly is your “face language.” A frown or a smile will tell all, and make or break someone’s day!

 

Two Woman in Black Sits on Chair Near Table

 

Third come the words. This is actually not our main way to communicate. For us, we must take care that tone and face and body communicate positivity. There are no words that will make up for a frown. 🙂

So yes, choose your words carefully and positively, and match them with a welcoming posture and smile.

Now, you are on your way to being a great communicator!

Communicate Positively,

Pamela

 


Fig¹.  Photo by Gradikaa Aggi on Unsplash

Fig².  Photo by Helena Lopes on Pexels

Fig³.  Photo by Christina Morillo on Pexels

The Classic Pamela Positive: “I Would Make Something Happen” – Louis L’Amour

 

One of our prolific American writers from the Midwest, Louis L’Amour wrote about the rugged wilderness of the west in the 1900s. He spoke of our pioneering spirit, the need to create our future, and the adventure of it all. And so he has good advice for any entrepreneur:

 

“I would not sit waiting for some vague tomorrow, nor for something to happen. One could wait a lifetime, and find nothing at the end of the waiting. I would begin here, I would make something happen.”

-Louis L’Amour

 

Man Walking

 


Louis L’Amour was an American author. He is best known for his Western fiction novels, though he also wrote historical fiction, science fiction, nonfiction, poetry and short-story collections.  He was born Louis Dearborn LaMoore on March 22, 1908, the last of seven children.  He grew up in Jamestown, North Dakota, a medium-sized farming community.  As he grew older, he traveled throughout the United States and abroad, in various positions including as a mine assessment worker, a professional boxer and a merchant seaman.

In the 1930s, Louis and his family settled in Oklahoma, and Louis turned his focus to writing.  He began to have success with short stories in the late ‘30s and ‘40s, beginning to sell novels in the 1950s.  Louis also served in the United States Army during World War II. Louis ultimately wrote 89 novels and more than 250 short stories.

Bio Source: Wikipedia


Fig¹.  Photo by Jeffrey Czum on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “Civility Is The Behavior That Marks…Share Common, Public, and Political Space” – Daniel Mendelsohn

 

“Civility is the behavior that marks mutual acknowledgement that we individuals share common, public, and political space. Think about the platforms through which you interact with people all day, the media that we call social, but if anything, have enhanced our ability to be asocial.

To screen every element of society, culture and politics that doesn’t suit or flatter or soothe us; thereby, removing the necessity for civility in the first place.”

―Daniel Mendelsohn

 

Graciousness, goodness, civility—all of this helps us to maintain a sense of calm and peace. Did you know anxiety is one of the most prevalent challenges we face in the U.S.? Nearly one 1/5 of our population experiences it. Yet only 1/3 try to find help.1 They are hurting… and continue to hurt. 

 

man wearing knit cap on grey background

 

Where do we think this anxiety is coming from? First, it’s coming from disconnectedness. We aren’t really getting the nurturance and love that we need from one-on-one interactions. And those interactions need to be with people we don’t know, and with people we do.

With people we do know, we build upon positive loving actions that make them become habit and security. With people we don’t know, it enforces the need to extend ourselves, to spread love and to give back. Both are essential.

 

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If we want more civility, that means that we need to slow down. If we want more civility, that means less screen time. If we want more civility, that means that we care and express our love for more people. It’s that simple. And who doesn’t want to love more? So let’s try.

May you live a civil day today, may you live it with care for everyone in every word that you give out, in every touch, and every comment that you make. And in every thought, so that in our minds and in our actions, civility becomes the natural way again.

 

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How we all long for graciousness and civility!

With Graciousness,

Pamela

 


Daniel Mendelsohn is a classist, writer, and critic. A graduate of Princeton’s graduate school, he published work on Euripidean tragedy before he went on to become a contributor to publications such as The New York TimesOutThe Nation and more. He was born in Long Island and raised in Old Bethage, New York. He received his undergraduate degree at the University of Virginia in Classics. He writes reviews on books, films, theater and television. He has won Princeton University’s James Madison Medal in 2018, American Philological Association President’s Award for service to the Classics in 2014 and the American Academy of Arts and Letters award for Prose Style in 2014. Currently, he is a professor at Bard College. He is also the director of the Robert B. Silvers Foundation, which supports writers. In his free time, Mendelsohn enjoys watching television and going to the movie theater. He has two children and four siblings, including a brother who is a film director, another brother who is a photographer and a sister who is a journalist.

Bio Source: Wikipedia, Daniel Mendelsohn Official Website


Citations:

1 “Facts & Statistics”, Anxiety and Depression Association of America, https://adaa.org/about-adaa/press-room/facts-statistics

Fig¹.  Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash

Fig². Photo by Kira auf der Heide on Unsplash

Fig³. Photo by Naassom Azevedo on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “Love Is Not Love Until Love’s Vulnerable” – Wisdom Inside a Chocolate Wrapper

 

“Love is not love until love’s vulnerable.” 

 

The Dream by Theodore Roethke,

as found on the inside of a Trader Joe’s chocolate bar wrapper

 

 

chocolates

 

 

Yes, wisdom can come in chocolate!  Well, being vulnerable is important.  We show we care, show we want to learn, and grow in love.  We love the other person more and we love ourselves more.

 

Be Vulnerable, Grow, Love!

 

Pamela

 


Theodore Roethke (1908-1963) was an American poet who won the Pulitzer Prize for poetry, for his book The Waking.  His other best-known books include The Lost Son, The Far Field, and Words for the Wind.  His poetry is noted for its rhythm, imagery and focus on nature.  He grew up in Saginaw, Michigan and his father was a German immigrant.  He received his B.A. and M.A. from the University of Michigan for English.  He went on to graduate school at Harvard College before he would leave to teach English at a number of universities.  In 1953, Roethke married a former student, Beatrice O’Connell.  Roethke is widely considered to be one of the most accomplished and influential poets of his time.  He taught poetry at the University of Washington for many years and was highly regarded by his colleagues and students.

Bio Source: Wikipedia


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Fig¹.Photo by amirali mirhashemian on Unsplash

 

 

 

The Classic Pamela Positive: “We Were Born to Succeed, Not to Fail.” – Henry David Thoreau

 

“We were born to succeed, not to fail.”

– Henry David Thoreau

 

man sitting on mountain cliff facing white clouds rising one hand at golden hour

 

 

That is our life purpose. To follow our calling in our own specially designed way. And so we will succeed, because the measurement is solely on how you uniquely pursue your talents, goals and qualities. Everyone has a different picture of success, his or her own beautiful expression.

 

 

I Love Your Expression,

Pamela

 


Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862) was an author, philosopher, poet, abolitionist, and naturalist. He grew up in Massachusetts, into the “modest New England family” of John Thoreau, a pencil maker, and Cynthia Dunbar. He had two older siblings, Helen and John Jr., and a younger sister, Sophia. Thoreau’s birthplace still exists on Virginia Road in Concord. He studied at Harvard College between 1833 and 1837.

After college, he opened a grammar school with his brother in Concord, Massachusetts. During this time, he met Ralph Waldo Emerson who introduced him to other writers and encouraged him to publish his thoughts. He is the author of Walden, which is a philosophical argument for simple living and preservation of natural environment.  He also had other important writings on natural history, environmentalism and civil disobedience.

Biosource: Wikipedia


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Fig¹.Photo by Ian Stauffer on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: To Have a Positive Mindset: Think about Building your Mind as you would your Dream Home

 

 

When you build a home, you have to have a vision. A vision of what you would like to create.  If you have a negative vision of your home then it certainly is not going to become a beautiful home!   So we need to maintain that vision, even when the going gets rough. Even if you run out of brick. Even if the paint color didn’t match the way you wanted it to. Even if you have to fumigate!  Hold the vision, and keep striving for it.

 

 

four orange, green, blue, and red paint rollers

 

 

So what has helped me during tough times is not just to focus on the positive, but on gratitude. Even in tough times there is something to be grateful for.  If you are having a hard time in sales and partnerships, perhaps you can be grateful you uplifted that potential client’s day with a positive smile or sincere compliment…

 

On an entirely different level… if a natural disaster has occurred, you can still be grateful that the sun came out, as in many countries pollution blocks the sun. That a friend is near. That people are caring and helping.

 

 

man and woman hugging each other photography

 

 

Even in a crisis, and often especially in a crisis, the greatest goodness of people comes out.  We can find the good even when we don’t seem ‘to have or own much.’    True wealth comes from qualities of being loving, kind, sincere, genuine, giving. And how wonderful — that that wealth is available to each one of us, every moment.

 

 


Citations:

Fig¹. David Pisnoy on Unsplash

Fig². Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

The Pamela Positive: “There is a whole vista out there I didn’t anticipate.” – Jane Fonda

 

 

Jane Fonda was once asked what she learned, through a multi-talented, 60+ year career what she learned about handling the peaks and the valleys…. Here is what she had to say.

 

“Embrace it all. And it doesn’t have to peak and then be all downhill. I am over the hill in a chronological sense, but there is a whole vista out there that I didn’t anticipate. So you can reach the peak and then you can go down and it can be just as interesting. It’s a good idea not to pay too much attention to what other people think are the peaks and valleys.”

—Jane Fonda

 

 

photo of man climbing mountain

 

 

How we should be encouraged to see the vistas!

You’re not going down, you are just being grateful for the new vista, the next new vista. Stay looking up and onwards.

 

I’m Keeping Vista Views for us All,

Pamela

 

 


Jane Seymour Fonda (born December 21, 1937)is an American actress, writer, producer, political activist, fitness guru, and former fashion model. She is the recipient of various accolades including two Academy Awards, two BAFTA Awards, four Golden Globe Awards, a Primetime Emmy Award, the AFI Life Achievement Award, and the Honorary Golden Lion. In addition to her acting, Fonda became an outspoken critic of the Vietnam War. She traveled to North Vietnam in 1972 — a visit that caused an uproar back at home. Fonda also fought for social causes, serving as a spokesperson on issues of civil rights and women’s rights.

She was born in New York City on December 21, 1937. Her parents were Canadian-born socialite Frances Ford Brokaw (née Seymour; 1908–1950), and actor Henry Fonda (1905–1982). According to her father, their surname came from an Italian ancestor who immigrated to the Netherlands in the 1500s. She has a brother, Peter, who is also an actor, and a maternal half-sister, Frances de Villers Brokaw (aka “Pan”), whose daughter is Pilar Corrias, the owner of the Pilar Corrias Gallery in London.  Fonda has been married three times — all of these unions ended in divorce. The daughter of acclaimed actor Henry Fonda, the actress has won two Oscars.

BioSource: Wikipedia, BIOGRAPHY


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Fig¹: Brad Barmore on Unsplash