Tag Archives: motivation

The Classic Pamela Positive: What To Do When You Don’t Know What To Do Next

 

What to do when you don’t know what to do next?

Have faith, then take another step.

 

pexels-photo-2132126

 

That’s how life works and soon you’ll reach your destination. So start walking, believing, and doing today!

Love,

Pamela

 


Fig¹.Photo by Quang Nguyen Vinh on Pexels

The Classic Pamela Positive: “I Got My Start by Giving Myself a Start.” – Madam C.J. Walker

 

In the 1900s, Madam C.J. Walker made her mark for black women (and all women) by becoming the first African-American self-made millionaire in America.  She had a problem herself; in setting out to solve it, she helped others.

Madam Walker was losing some of her hair. So she created a hair product company that addressed this need, while helping women feel stronger, prouder, more beautiful. She was a millionaire within fifteen years.

 

Madam_CJ_Walker_face_circa_1914

 

Yet it wasn’t just enhancing women’s beauty and self-esteem that made her unique. She employed thousands of women; she shone with brilliance by being a great CEO. And she left us with some inspiring mottos by which she lived her life.

Two of my favorites are:

 

“I got my start by giving myself a start.”

―Madam C.J. Walker

 

Photography of a Man And Woman Laughing

“I had to make my own living and my own opportunity. But I made it! Don’t sit down and wait for the opportunities to come. Get up and make them.”

―Madam C.J. Walker

 

Go “start” whatever you would love to do. It can be small, it can be on the side, it can be modest. But begin today. You will know yourself more, giving of your “only-you” talents.  You will also be providing opportunities and inspiration for others.

 


In honor of Black History month, we honor Madam C.J. Walker. She was the first self-made American millionaire who was African-American or female. Her own hair loss inspired her to experiment with home remedies, and then sell them throughout the country. She began by selling Madam Walker’s Wonderful Hair Grower, a healing conditioner for scalps. She traveled door-to-door throughout the South and Southeast to sell her products. Her corporation employed as many as 3,000 people at one point. Madam Walker also founded Lelia College to train “hair culturists,” assisting other black women to start their own businesses. She was a Civil Rights activist and philanthropist.

Madam Walker had a daughter, A’Lelia Walker. She became president of her mother’s company in 1919 and remained in that position until her death in August 1931.

Bio Source: Wikipedia  Fig¹. Photo by Wikimedia Commons  Fig². Photo by Min An on Pexels

The Classic Pamela Positive: Divide and Rule…Unite and Lead

 

He was brilliant, insightful and troubled at times, too… but this is a great quote from Johann Wolfgang von Goethe:

 

“Divide and rule, a sound motto;

unite and lead, a better one.”

―Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

 

photo-1429216967620-ece20ff3a5f9

 

It’s sad sometimes how, per Goethe’s quote above, we at times need to separate into distinct groups in order to have harmony…but in a close future, the habit will be one of uniting…and so a better you, me, all of us.


Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832) was a German poet, playwright, novelist, and natural philosopher, best known for his two-part poetic drama Faust, which he started around the age of twenty-three and didn’t finish until shortly before his death sixty years later. He is considered one of the greatest contributors of the German Romantic period. At the age of sixteen, in 1765, Goethe went to Leipzig University to study law as his father wished, though he also gained much recognition from the Rococo poems and lyrics he wrote during this period. In 1766 he fell in love with Anne Catharina Schoenkopf (1746-1810) and wrote his joyfully exuberant collection of poems Annette.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe formally married Christiane Vulpius in October 1806. He was opposed to the church ceremony that was, at the time, the only way of being legally married, so, although she bore Goethe a son, August, in 1789, he didn’t marry her until the Napoleonic army sacked the city in which they lived.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe now rests in the Fürstengruft or “Royal Tomb” in the “Historic Cemetery” in Weimar where his dear friend Schiller is also laid to rest. In honor of these two famous German men of letters, a statue of Goethe and Schiller now stands at the German National Theatre in Munich. UNESCO’S “Memory of the World” list includes the handwritten works of Goethe preserved by the Goethe-Schiller-Archive.

Bio Source: The Literature Network  Fig¹. Photo by Adeolu Eletu on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: What Motivates?

 

I had an hour and a half long conversation with a Dukie the other day, who pushed me to answer new questions! I love those conversations as they are so real and help us become better people, teachers, and learners.

Sinclair’s question was,

 

“You have a certain energy that inspires and drives people to action. How do you cultivate it, and how do you maintain it?”

 

photo-1476304884326-cd2c88572c5f.jpeg

 

I don’t think there’s any surefire answer here. But here’s what I said:

“Dear Sinclair,

What a lovely question to ask, and one that is important for all of us. First, I will say that I find you equally motivating. It’s just that we have different personalities. For example, I might be more enthusiastically inspired, but you are more quietly and grounded inspired. Thus we are drawn together, as I might bring a higher energy and you bring a special stillness. Does that make sense?”

Sinclair, there are many different types of leadership. Just because someone seems more extroverted and external with it, doesn’t mean that’s the only type of leadership. Leadership can be about quietness, about listening, and even about knowing when to pause. To be a great leader, you need to master all communication skills, which include when to speak, how to speak, what the tone is, and when not to speak. It also includes body language, and most importantly, it includes your inner values and soul.

“So how then do you stay authentic with who you are?”

The words authenticity and transparency comes up a lot these days, and I appreciate it. As we become more oriented around machines, computers, iPads, phones, and the social media explosion of Vine, no Vine, Instagram, Snapchat—it disappears, Pinterest—Facebook—Twitter—former Friendster; it becomes very confusing. Our identities need to be aligned. So here’s what I do, and it’s a constant quest every day. Leadership isn’t something you attain and let go. Leadership is something you believe in, live, and maintain. That’s what makes life so exciting!

Remember these tips are only from me. You might find that other people have a different view. In order to stay authentic, I keep my priorities very clear. I know that my life calling is to be the best Pamela Hawley I can be, not just to deliver the best UniversalGiving®. Therefore, I have to take a higher view than just my profession, my job, or even a calling. Even with a calling, you still have to put your identity and your values first. So how do I do that? First, you need to know that UniversalGiving® comes third in my life. Yes, that’s right. As much as I love it, as much as it is my calling and not a job, it comes third in my life. So I’m going to be pretty naked here, and let you know how my life works.

 

gray computer monitor

 

Priorities:

#1. God, Love, and/or Nature

I believe in a governing force of good for our universe. That means our universe is run based on certain principles that are loving, kind, and filled with integrity. Some people call that God, some people call it Love (it’s not just human love), and some people may relate to it as nature. The point is that there is a law of options going on in the universe that allows for the greatest good to occur. It’s our job to hook into it, work with it, and accelerate as much good as we can in our lifetimes. That will then pass onto others and reflect the true goodness that exists in this universe.

 

river near mountains

 

Our foundation of the world and ourselves is based on goodness, and we need to pay more attention to that, rather than all of the nuisances, annoyances, negative suggestions, negative thoughts, and challenging interactions we have with personalities. You can make that a huge part of reality or you can go back to your view of a loving universe, and make that your focus. So you have to train your mind and heart, in God or Love, every day, every moment.

 

#2. Family (…and Friends)

Family is absolutely essential. It’s where we attain a sense of peace, grounding, and comfort. I know for myself, I grew up with a mom who baked me chocolate chip cookies, sat with me after school in second grade, and listened to me. We did workbooks together, we talked about life, and I felt she was always there for me. To this day, if I call her, ninety percent of the time she picks up the phone; she’s present. She’s family, and she’s my grounding, as are many other members of my family.

 

family of five standing near trees during daytime

 

Family extends into many areas. For example, with my nephews and nieces, I was fortunate enough to take care of them many Saturday nights when they were growing up. I got them at the “meltdown” phase at around 3 o’clock and spent the night. I learned a lot! I bonded with them in ways I cannot even imagine. Today? I just called Connor, my 17-year-old nephew, to congratulate him on his soccer game. Maybe not so many teenagers would pick up their aunt’s call, but he does, and we have a conversation even if he’s in the middle of building a creative project for school. We just have that connection.

I really don’t see the point in life of being this major “success” if you don’t have that family to share it with. A family to inspire you, a family that you inspire. And with that, there’s a sense of peace. You know where you come from, you know what your values are, and when the world gets too heavy, you can go home to that values, whether that’s in a physical structure, or in your heart. It’s irreplaceable.

 

man and woman holding their daughter

 

Equally important are friends. Those friends are absolutely a part of your family network. I have friends with whom I have standing weekly or monthly meetings. For example, my “second moms” are women who were a very important part of my life growing up. I have monthly or quarterly lunches set up with them. I don’t want to take them for granted and just see them at the holiday party. I want to know how they are, hear how they are, and support them as they have supported me. It’s a true, ongoing relationship rather than a once-a-year fond remembrance.

 

photo of woman beside another woman at seashore

 

#3. UniversalGiving®

I don’t have a job—I have a calling! Every day I get up, I love what I do. I love being a social entrepreneur, and I love serving the world. I love volunteering, and I love helping scale the fact that thousands of other people can volunteer. So for me, it’s just a constant flow of doing good for the world, and helping my team do that, as well as reach their best. In summary, UniversalGiving helps people donate and volunteer in hundreds of countries across the world.

 

UG_Logo_HiRes_SM.jpg

 

Within that, I also rope in my volunteer events. I’m a consistent volunteer at City Impact, helping in the Tenderloin with everything from passing out food, doing apartment visits, to preparing Thanksgiving meals. I’m also a C.A.S.A., a Court-Appointed Special Advocate, which is a legal advocate for foster care youth who are often on the street. You work with them on a weekly, and sometimes daily basis to make sure they have food, housing, a listening ear, eyeglasses, job training, and whatever they might need. Many of them have had little or no training or modeling their entire life, so a lot of what you do also works on just helping them with social skills, and teaching them how to survive in the world.

 

#4. Improv

How I love improv! And you might think, “Well, how does this tie into the rest?” Improv is an incredible joy. It allows you to connect with your fellow actors on stage, and to be a true partner.

 

c1920x1080_72.jpg

 

It requires great creativity and quick thinking. It equally requires great listening and taking the back seat. It’s about sharing.

It’s about building. It’s about creating a scene from nothing. And in order to do that, you have to have absolute trust with your partner.

And isn’t that what life is? Sometimes you have to respond immediately, you always have to listen, and you need to be a great friend or partner in life—whether that’s in business, a marriage, or a friendship. So it actually synergizes. But even if it doesn’t, it’s so much fun! You should have things like that in your life, that seem opposite to everything else you do. As my oma, one of the greatest flutists in our generation, and the first woman at Juilliard for flute said, “You need to get out there and kick up your heels once in awhile!” She was an extremely hard-worker and helped support her family during the depression. Her point was, get out there and dance. Get out there and have fun. Work hard and yet, live a little.

 

photo-1509587643525-b2cf3233c20b.jpeg

 

So, Sinclair, I’m not sure this fully answered your question, but this is how I try to maintain my true self and identity in life. Thank you for asking such an important question, and I hope this helps you in your journey!


Fig¹.  Photo by Ben White on Unsplash  Fig². Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash  Fig³. Photo by Mark Koch on Unsplash Fig⁴. Photo by Blake Barlow on Unsplash Fig⁵. Photo by Jeniffer Araújo on Unsplash  Fig⁶. Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash  Fig⁹. Photo by Andrew Rice on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “You’ll See Spirit Operating Everywhere” – Dan Millman

 

“Like the flower, trusting Spirit working according to a higher will beyond the reach of your mind, you’ll see Spirit operating everywhere, in everyone and everything… To trust the process of your life. The more you trust Spirit in this way, the more you will work with it directly as a living force in your life… unfolding, like a flower, toward the Light.” 

—Dan Millman

 

Purple Flowers in Bloom

 


Dan Millman began his career in the athletic arena. He competed in gymnastics and trampoline in high school and college, winning international acclaim. He became gymnastics director at Stanford University in 1968, and in 1972 moved to Oberlin College. He began writing in the 1980s, on diverse topics including fitness and philosophy. His writing and motivational speaking tend to focus on achieving one’s potential. In 2006, his book Way of the Peaceful Warrior was adapted into a film, Peaceful Warrior. He is married to Joy Millman, and they have three daughters and two grandchildren.

Bio Source: Wikipedia  Fig¹.  Photo by Simon Matzinger on Pexels

The Classic Pamela Positive: “…The Things People Really Want Are Love, Connection, And Purpose.” – Mallika Chopra

 

“…The things people really want are love, connection, and purpose.”

-Mallika Chopra

 

That is indeed true wealth. It’s our family, our faith in Life, and our driving motivation — what makes us want to be here on earth.

 

 

blah.jpeg

 

 

First, love means we are all created to do something for others.   Whether it is our daughter, our dog, or the doorman — everyone needs kindness and love.

Then, we must dedicate ourselves to something positive and contributive, where our soul makes a difference.  That can be an organization, a person, or simply our commitment to a way of being.

 

 

kat-yukawa-754726-unsplash.jpg

 

 

Love and Purpose.  A fine way to live, and, enough to work on for every moment!

Lovingly, Pamela

 

 


Mallika Chopra is the Founder & CEO of Intent.com, an online community where members can share their dreams and aspirations, and receive support from others.  She stated that “My intent is to connect with others by sharing and listening to each other’s stories.”  Mallika learned about the power of intention at a young age from her father, Deepak Chopra, who taught her and her family to ask for love, hope, purpose, passion, inspiration and so many other positive qualities in their lives every day. Mallika is mom to Tara and Leela and has written two books inspired by them — 100 Promises To My Baby and 100 Questions From My Child. Her prior experience includes launching MTV in India, Michael Jackson’s Heal The World Foundation, and working with various internet companies. Mallika holds a B.A. from Brown and an M.B.A. from Kellogg University. (Bio source: Intent.com: About Us)

The Classic Pamela Positive: What Motivates?

 

I had an hour and a half long conversation with a Dukie the other day, who pushed me to answer new questions! I love those conversations as they are so real and help us become better people, teachers, and learners.

Sinclair’s question was,

 

“You have a certain energy that inspires and drives people to action. How do you cultivate it, and how do you maintain it?”

 

 

photo-1476304884326-cd2c88572c5f.jpeg

 

 

I don’t think there’s any surefire answer here. But here’s what I said:

“Dear Sinclair,

What a lovely question to ask, and one that is important for all of us. First, I will say that I find you equally motivating. It’s just that we have different personalities. For example, I might be more enthusiastically inspired, but you are more quietly and grounded inspired. Thus we are drawn together, as I might bring a higher energy and you bring a special stillness. Does that make sense?”

Sinclair, there are many different types of leadership. Just because someone seems more extroverted and external with it, doesn’t mean that’s the only type of leadership. Leadership can be about quietness, about listening, and even about knowing when to pause. To be a great leader, you need to master all communication skills, which include when to speak, how to speak, what the tone is, and when not to speak. It also includes body language, and most importantly, it includes your inner values and soul.

“So how then do you stay authentic with who you are?”

The words authenticity and transparency comes up a lot these days, and I appreciate it. As we become more oriented around machines, computers, iPads, phones, and the social media explosion of Vine, no Vine, Instagram, Snapchat—it disappears, Pinterest—Facebook—Twitter—former Friendster; it becomes very confusing. Our identities need to be aligned. So here’s what I do, and it’s a constant quest every day. Leadership isn’t something you attain and let go. Leadership is something you believe in, live, and maintain. That’s what makes life so exciting!

Remember these tips are only from me. You might find that other people have a different view. In order to stay authentic, I keep my priorities very clear. I know that my life calling is to be the best Pamela Hawley I can be, not just to deliver the best UniversalGiving. Therefore, I have to take a higher view than just my profession, my job, or even a calling. Even with a calling, you still have to put your identity and your values first. So how do I do that? First, you need to know that UniversalGiving comes third in my life. Yes, that’s right. As much as I love it, as much as it is my calling and not a job, it comes third in my life. So I’m going to be pretty naked here, and let you know how my life works.

 

 

photo-1503945438517-f65904a52ce6.jpeg

 

Priorities:

#1. God, Love, and/or Nature

I believe in a governing force of good for our universe. That means our universe is run based on certain principles that are loving, kind, and filled with integrity. Some people call that God, some people call it Love (it’s not just human love), and some people may relate to it as nature. The point is that there is a law of options going on in the universe that allows for the greatest good to occur. It’s our job to hook into it, work with it, and accelerate as much good as we can in our lifetimes. That will then pass onto others and reflect the true goodness that exists in this universe.

 

 

photo-1500259783852-0ca9ce8a64dc

 

 

Our foundation of the world and ourselves is based on goodness, and we need to pay more attention to that, rather than all of the nuisances, annoyances, negative suggestions, negative thoughts, and challenging interactions we have with personalities. You can make that a huge part of reality or you can go back to your view of a loving universe, and make that your focus. So you have to train your mind and heart, in God or Love, every day, every moment.

 

#2. Family (…and Friends)

Family is absolutely essential. It’s where we attain a sense of peace, grounding, and comfort. I know for myself, I grew up with a mom who baked me chocolate chip cookies, sat with me after school in second grade, and listened to me. We did workbooks together, we talked about life, and I felt she was always there for me. To this day, if I call her, ninety percent of the time she picks up the phone; she’s present. She’s family, and she’s my grounding, as are many other members of my family.

 

 

photo-1516901408257-500ed7566e6a.jpeg

 

 

Family extends into many areas. For example, with my nephews and nieces, I was fortunate enough to take care of them many Saturday nights when they were growing up. I got them at the “meltdown” phase at around 3 o’clock and spent the night. I learned a lot! I bonded with them in ways I cannot even imagine. Today? I just called Connor, my 17-year-old nephew, to congratulate him on his soccer game. Maybe not so many teenagers would pick up their aunt’s call, but he does, and we have a conversation even if he’s in the middle of building a creative project for school. We just have that connection.

I really don’t see the point in life of being this major “success” if you don’t have that family to share it with. A family to inspire you, a family that you inspire. And with that, there’s a sense of peace. You know where you come from, you know what your values are, and when the world gets too heavy, you can go home to that values, whether that’s in a physical structure, or in your heart. It’s irreplaceable.

 

 

photo-1516050327434-9d06ea9bfae8.jpeg

 

 

Equally important are friends. Those friends are absolutely a part of your family network. I have friends with whom I have standing weekly or monthly meetings. For example, my “second moms” are women who were a very important part of my life growing up. I have monthly or quarterly lunches set up with them. I don’t want to take them for granted and just see them at the holiday party. I want to know how they are, hear how they are, and support them as they have supported me. It’s a true, ongoing relationship rather than a once-a-year fond remembrance.

 

 

photo-1464207687429-7505649dae38.jpeg

 

 

#3. UniversalGiving

I don’t have a job—I have a calling! Every day I get up, I love what I do. I love being a social entrepreneur, and I love serving the world. I love volunteering, and I love helping scale the fact that thousands of other people can volunteer. So for me, it’s just a constant flow of doing good for the world, and helping my team do that, as well as reach their best. In summary, UniversalGiving helps people donate and volunteer in hundreds of countries across the world.

 

UG_Logo_HiRes_SM.jpg

 

Within that, I also rope in my volunteer events. I’m a consistent volunteer at City Impact, helping in the Tenderloin with everything from passing out food, doing apartment visits, to preparing Thanksgiving meals. I’m also a C.A.S.A., a Court-Appointed Special Advocate, which is a legal advocate for foster care youth who are often on the street. You work with them on a weekly, and sometimes daily basis to make sure they have food, housing, a listening ear, eyeglasses, job training, and whatever they might need. Many of them have had little or no training or modeling their entire life, so a lot of what you do also works on just helping them with social skills, and teaching them how to survive in the world.

 

#4. Improv

How I love improv! And you might think, “Well, how does this tie into the rest?” Improv is an incredible joy. It allows you to connect with your fellow actors on stage, and to be a true partner.

 

 

c1920x1080_72.jpg

 

 

It requires great creativity and quick thinking. It equally requires great listening and taking the back seat. It’s about sharing.

It’s about building. It’s about creating a scene from nothing. And in order to do that, you have to have absolute trust with your partner.

And isn’t that what life is? Sometimes you have to respond immediately, you always have to listen, and you need to be a great friend or partner in life—whether that’s in business, a marriage, or a friendship. So it actually synergizes. But even if it doesn’t, it’s so much fun! You should have things like that in your life, that seem opposite to everything else you do. As my oma, one of the greatest flutists in our generation, and the first woman at Juilliard for flute said, “You need to get out there and kick up your heels once in awhile!” She was an extremely hard-worker and helped support her family during the depression. Her point was, get out there and dance. Get out there and have fun. Work hard and yet, live a little.

 

 

photo-1509587643525-b2cf3233c20b.jpeg

 

 

So, Sinclair, I’m not sure this fully answered your question, but this is how I try to maintain my true self and identity in life. Thank you for asking such an important question, and I hope this helps you in your journey!