Tag Archives: motivation

The Classic Pamela Positive: “…The Things People Really Want Are Love, Connection, And Purpose.” – Mallika Chopra

 

“…The things people really want are love, connection, and purpose.”

-Mallika Chopra

 

That is indeed true wealth. It’s our family, our faith in Life, and our driving motivation — what makes us want to be here on earth.

 

 

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First, love means we are all created to do something for others.   Whether it is our daughter, our dog, or the doorman — everyone needs kindness and love.

Then, we must dedicate ourselves to something positive and contributive, where our soul makes a difference.  That can be an organization, a person, or simply our commitment to a way of being.

 

 

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Love and Purpose.  A fine way to live, and, enough to work on for every moment!

Lovingly, Pamela

 

 


Mallika Chopra is the Founder & CEO of Intent.com, an online community where members can share their dreams and aspirations, and receive support from others.  She stated that “My intent is to connect with others by sharing and listening to each other’s stories.”  Mallika learned about the power of intention at a young age from her father, Deepak Chopra, who taught her and her family to ask for love, hope, purpose, passion, inspiration and so many other positive qualities in their lives every day. Mallika is mom to Tara and Leela and has written two books inspired by them — 100 Promises To My Baby and 100 Questions From My Child. Her prior experience includes launching MTV in India, Michael Jackson’s Heal The World Foundation, and working with various internet companies. Mallika holds a B.A. from Brown and an M.B.A. from Kellogg University. (Bio source: Intent.com: About Us)

The Classic Pamela Positive: What Motivates?

 

I had an hour and a half long conversation with a Dukie the other day, who pushed me to answer new questions! I love those conversations as they are so real and help us become better people, teachers, and learners.

Sinclair’s question was,

 

“You have a certain energy that inspires and drives people to action. How do you cultivate it, and how do you maintain it?”

 

 

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I don’t think there’s any surefire answer here. But here’s what I said:

“Dear Sinclair,

What a lovely question to ask, and one that is important for all of us. First, I will say that I find you equally motivating. It’s just that we have different personalities. For example, I might be more enthusiastically inspired, but you are more quietly and grounded inspired. Thus we are drawn together, as I might bring a higher energy and you bring a special stillness. Does that make sense?”

Sinclair, there are many different types of leadership. Just because someone seems more extroverted and external with it, doesn’t mean that’s the only type of leadership. Leadership can be about quietness, about listening, and even about knowing when to pause. To be a great leader, you need to master all communication skills, which include when to speak, how to speak, what the tone is, and when not to speak. It also includes body language, and most importantly, it includes your inner values and soul.

“So how then do you stay authentic with who you are?”

The words authenticity and transparency comes up a lot these days, and I appreciate it. As we become more oriented around machines, computers, iPads, phones, and the social media explosion of Vine, no Vine, Instagram, Snapchat—it disappears, Pinterest—Facebook—Twitter—former Friendster; it becomes very confusing. Our identities need to be aligned. So here’s what I do, and it’s a constant quest every day. Leadership isn’t something you attain and let go. Leadership is something you believe in, live, and maintain. That’s what makes life so exciting!

Remember these tips are only from me. You might find that other people have a different view. In order to stay authentic, I keep my priorities very clear. I know that my life calling is to be the best Pamela Hawley I can be, not just to deliver the best UniversalGiving. Therefore, I have to take a higher view than just my profession, my job, or even a calling. Even with a calling, you still have to put your identity and your values first. So how do I do that? First, you need to know that UniversalGiving comes third in my life. Yes, that’s right. As much as I love it, as much as it is my calling and not a job, it comes third in my life. So I’m going to be pretty naked here, and let you know how my life works.

 

 

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Priorities:

#1. God, Love, and/or Nature

I believe in a governing force of good for our universe. That means our universe is run based on certain principles that are loving, kind, and filled with integrity. Some people call that God, some people call it Love (it’s not just human love), and some people may relate to it as nature. The point is that there is a law of options going on in the universe that allows for the greatest good to occur. It’s our job to hook into it, work with it, and accelerate as much good as we can in our lifetimes. That will then pass onto others and reflect the true goodness that exists in this universe.

 

 

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Our foundation of the world and ourselves is based on goodness, and we need to pay more attention to that, rather than all of the nuisances, annoyances, negative suggestions, negative thoughts, and challenging interactions we have with personalities. You can make that a huge part of reality or you can go back to your view of a loving universe, and make that your focus. So you have to train your mind and heart, in God or Love, every day, every moment.

 

#2. Family (…and Friends)

Family is absolutely essential. It’s where we attain a sense of peace, grounding, and comfort. I know for myself, I grew up with a mom who baked me chocolate chip cookies, sat with me after school in second grade, and listened to me. We did workbooks together, we talked about life, and I felt she was always there for me. To this day, if I call her, ninety percent of the time she picks up the phone; she’s present. She’s family, and she’s my grounding, as are many other members of my family.

 

 

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Family extends into many areas. For example, with my nephews and nieces, I was fortunate enough to take care of them many Saturday nights when they were growing up. I got them at the “meltdown” phase at around 3 o’clock and spent the night. I learned a lot! I bonded with them in ways I cannot even imagine. Today? I just called Connor, my 17-year-old nephew, to congratulate him on his soccer game. Maybe not so many teenagers would pick up their aunt’s call, but he does, and we have a conversation even if he’s in the middle of building a creative project for school. We just have that connection.

I really don’t see the point in life of being this major “success” if you don’t have that family to share it with. A family to inspire you, a family that you inspire. And with that, there’s a sense of peace. You know where you come from, you know what your values are, and when the world gets too heavy, you can go home to that values, whether that’s in a physical structure, or in your heart. It’s irreplaceable.

 

 

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Equally important are friends. Those friends are absolutely a part of your family network. I have friends with whom I have standing weekly or monthly meetings. For example, my “second moms” are women who were a very important part of my life growing up. I have monthly or quarterly lunches set up with them. I don’t want to take them for granted and just see them at the holiday party. I want to know how they are, hear how they are, and support them as they have supported me. It’s a true, ongoing relationship rather than a once-a-year fond remembrance.

 

 

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#3. UniversalGiving

I don’t have a job—I have a calling! Every day I get up, I love what I do. I love being a social entrepreneur, and I love serving the world. I love volunteering, and I love helping scale the fact that thousands of other people can volunteer. So for me, it’s just a constant flow of doing good for the world, and helping my team do that, as well as reach their best. In summary, UniversalGiving helps people donate and volunteer in hundreds of countries across the world.

 

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Within that, I also rope in my volunteer events. I’m a consistent volunteer at City Impact, helping in the Tenderloin with everything from passing out food, doing apartment visits, to preparing Thanksgiving meals. I’m also a C.A.S.A., a Court-Appointed Special Advocate, which is a legal advocate for foster care youth who are often on the street. You work with them on a weekly, and sometimes daily basis to make sure they have food, housing, a listening ear, eyeglasses, job training, and whatever they might need. Many of them have had little or no training or modeling their entire life, so a lot of what you do also works on just helping them with social skills, and teaching them how to survive in the world.

 

#4. Improv

How I love improv! And you might think, “Well, how does this tie into the rest?” Improv is an incredible joy. It allows you to connect with your fellow actors on stage, and to be a true partner.

 

 

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It requires great creativity and quick thinking. It equally requires great listening and taking the back seat. It’s about sharing.

It’s about building. It’s about creating a scene from nothing. And in order to do that, you have to have absolute trust with your partner.

And isn’t that what life is? Sometimes you have to respond immediately, you always have to listen, and you need to be a great friend or partner in life—whether that’s in business, a marriage, or a friendship. So it actually synergizes. But even if it doesn’t, it’s so much fun! You should have things like that in your life, that seem opposite to everything else you do. As my oma, one of the greatest flutists in our generation, and the first woman at Juilliard for flute said, “You need to get out there and kick up your heels once in awhile!” She was an extremely hard-worker and helped support her family during the depression. Her point was, get out there and dance. Get out there and have fun. Work hard and yet, live a little.

 

 

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So, Sinclair, I’m not sure this fully answered your question, but this is how I try to maintain my true self and identity in life. Thank you for asking such an important question, and I hope this helps you in your journey!

 

The Classic Pamela Positive: “You’ll See Spirit Operating Everywhere” —Dan Millman

 

“Like the flower, trusting Spirit working according to a higher will beyond the reach of your mind, you’ll see Spirit operating everywhere, in everyone and everything…

 

 

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…To trust the process of your life. The more you trust Spirit in this way, the more you will work with it directly as a living force in your life… unfolding, like a flower, toward the Light.” 

—Dan Millman

 

 

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Dan Millman is an American writer and speaker. He was born and raised in Los Angeles, California, where he had an extremely active childhood. He took part in modern dance, trampoline, and gymnastics. Millman attended University of California, Berkeley, where he would receive study psychology. He won the 1964 Trampoline World Championships in London, earned All-American honors and won an NCAA Championship in vaulting, and in 1966 he won the USGF championship in floor exercise. He won four Gold Medals in gymnastics at the 1966 Maccabiah Games. He would go on to coach gymnastics at Stanford University, before he began conducting motivational seminars and presenting keynote speeches. He’s married to Joy Millman and they have three adult children.

 

The Classic Pamela Positive: “You Have To Get People Talking The Same Language Before You Get Them Around The Table.” – Pakzan Dastoor

“You have to get people talking the same language before you get them around the table. ”

– Pakzan Dastoor

 

What a wonderful insight from the Dasra Foundation!

Dasra is an innovative foundation working on extreme social change in India.  I just heard them speak at an amazing conference at Stanford focusing on Indian philanthropy. Local Indians and Silicon Valley Indian entrepreneurs gathered together to discuss how to give intelligently.

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Dasra’s strategic approach to social problems has dramatically increased the impact and scale of social change in India. They helped take nearly 1000 nonprofits and socially conscious businesses to the next level. They have more than 28 research reports ranging from adolescent girls’ empowerment to child malnutrition and sports for development.

And Pakzan is right. The Advisory Leader of Dasra knows that we need to collaborate, listen, and support one another in order to achieve true success.

So the “right language” is not really about a dialect.  It’s about our motivations.

Before we come to the table, we need to be on the same page.   That means our motives and aspirations are aligned.   Then we are really listening!  And the conversation builds to higher levels to serve the world, our communities and our partnerships.

Are you facing a challenge in philanthropy today? Or how about your own life?

We can take Pakzan’s advice. Let’s slow down. We can make sure we are listening.   Are we speaking the same language? You might both be speaking Hindi. But if you don’t have the same values, your words will blow right one another.

To truly scale we must have the same values.      

We can be great social innovators, communicators and doers by speaking the same language: Listen, love and support your partner.

 

 


 

 

As India’s leading strategic philanthropy foundation, Dasra actively shapes the process of social change by forming powerful partnerships with funders and social enterprises. In the past 15 years, Dasra has been working towards building a ‘thriving ecosystem’ that enables knowledge creation, capacity building, strategic funding, and collaboration in order to touch and transform the lives of 800 million Indians. 

The Classic Pamela Positive: How Close You Are To Success?

“Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”

-Thomas A. Edison

 

That’s a shocking statement.  How close you are to success….

You can do it…

You could do it…

You are ascending the mountain…

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and you stop.

 

How close are you?  Connect with your true, heart-deep motivation.  Instead of focusing on blocks, frustration or being tired, you can focus on why you are doing what you do.

They Gave Up. They Didn’t Realize. They Were So Close!  Success was just there….. all what Edison tells us.

 

So what will you do today? Give up or cross over?  Give up or stand up? Give up or ascend? Continue on your pathway, and firmly but gently, success will lead you.

 

Thank you dear Thomas Edison, as we know you failed thousands of times. Yet your success still shines in our lives today.

 

 


 

 

Edison was born in 1847 in the canal town of Milan, Ohio. In 1859 Edison began working on a local branch of the Grand Trunk Railroad, selling newspapers, magazines, and candy. At one point he also conducted chemical experiments in a baggage-car laboratory.

 

 

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In 1868 Edison became an independent inventor in Boston. Edison soon acquired a reputation as a first-rank inventor. In 1871, Edison married 16-year-old Mary Stilwell, whom he had met two months earlier. She was an employee at one of his shops.  They had three children. Mary Edison died at age 29 in 1884, of unknown causes.

 

While working on the telephone in the summer of 1877, Edison discovered a method of recording sound, and in the late fall he unveiled the phonograph. Finally, beginning in the fall of 1878, Edison devoted thirty months to developing a complete system of incandescent electric lighting.

In 1886, at the age of thirty-nine, Edison married the 20-year-old Mina Miller. They also had three children together. Edison generally preferred spending time in the laboratory to being with his family. By the time of his death on October 18, 1931, Edison had received 1,093 U.S. patents, a total still untouched by any other inventor. Even more important, he created a model for modern industrial research.

The Classic Pamela Positive: Deal with the Complete Person – Zig Ziglar

Man is tridimensional (physical, mental, and spiritual). I deal with the complete person. This is the only way to have complete success.”

 

Zig Ziglar

 

 

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We can’t just deal with people from one viewpoint. We all have such important, varied qualities about us. And that’s changing moment by moment… and needs to be honored moment by moment. Who the person is holistically, when honored, brings the greatest benefit to your relationship, your environment, your work, your home.

 

 

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In addition, Zig was known as one of the most positive, joyful people. He wanted to celebrate people; celebrate them for who they are. And so he also celebrated life for who he is: A positive family man; a father and grandfather; a leader; a kind person; a doer of good; a prolific speaker; an engaging writer; and an encourager of others. That’s the holistic Zig Ziglar.   

 

 

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Hilary Hinton “Zig” Ziglar was a motivational speaker, emphasizing Christian values and achieving success in all areas of life. He was born in Alabama in 1926, to a large family and he was the tenth of twelve children. His family lived there for a few years before moving to Mississippi. Zig dealt with tragedy early in his childhood– losing his father and little sister within the same week. He moved to South Carolina to take part in the Navy Training program at the University of South Carolina. Later, he would join forces to create a company that aimed to change America’s view of salesperson through seminars. This would begin his long and successful time as a speaker that traveled around the country.

 

He was the author of nine books, including See You at the Top and Raising Positive Kids in a Negative World. In 2001, Ziglar was awarded the Cavett Award by The National Speakers Association for bringing honor to the profession and showing commitment to mentoring other members. He passed away November 2012, after his 40-year speaking career brought him to consult for Fortune 500 companies and leaders around the world. He was married to Jean Ziglar and they had four children and seven grandchildren.

The Classic Pamela Positive: “I Got My Start by Giving Myself a Start.” – First African-American Self-Made Millionaire, Madam C.J. Walker

 

In the 1900s, Madam C.J. Walker made her mark for black women (and all women) by becoming the first African-American self-made millionaire in America.  She had a problem herself; in setting out to solve it, she helped others.

Madam Walker was losing some of her hair.  So she created a hair product company which addressed this need, while helping women feel stronger, prouder, more beautiful.  She was a millionaire within fifteen years.

 

 

Yet it wasn’t just enhancing women’s beauty and self-esteem that made her unique.  She employed thousands of women; she shone with brilliance by being a great CEO.  And she left us with some inspiring mottos by which she lived her life.

Two of my favorites are:

 

“I got my start by giving myself a start.”

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“I had to make my own living and my own opportunity. But I made it! Don’t sit down and wait for the opportunities to come. Get up and make them.”

 

Go “start” whatever you would love to do. It can be small, it can be on the side, it can be modest. But begin today.  You will know yourself more, giving of your “only-you” talents.  You will also be providing opportunities and inspiration for others.

 


 

In honor of Black History month, we honor Madam C.J. Walker.  She was the first self-made American millionaire who was African-American or female.  Her own hair loss inspired her to experiment with home remedies, and then sell them throughout the country. She began by selling Madam Walker’s Wonderful Hair Grower, a healing conditioner for scalps.  She traveled door-to-door throughout the South and Southeast to sell her products.  Her corporation employed as many as 3,000 people at one point.  Madam Walker also founded Lelia College to train “hair culturists,” assisting other black women to start their own businesses.  She was a Civil Rights activist and philanthropist.