Tag Archives: friendship

The Classic Pamela Positive: “What’s Important To You Is Important To Me”

 

“What’s important to you is important to me.”

 

photo-1489942986787-cded4ecf962e

 

This is one of my favorite statements. It helps me understand and sincerely care about others. When we truly listen to our family, friends, partners, team mates, improv players, then we can really hear…what’s important.

Sometimes it might be a clean kitchen. For others, it might be taking the dog for a walk or getting the car cleaned. Or it might be that you showed up at your daughter’s gymnastics recital. And sometimes, sitting down and listening to your boyfriend, while not multitasking and cleaning the dishes at the same time, maybe the biggest sign of attention. It can even be as small as keeping your desk clean at work because you know it inspires your manager.

 

men's gray button-up shirt

 

The point is, we all fall into habits. These habits are what are most comfortable, and convenient, for us. They are our priorities. But they are not necessarily important to others. Instead, we need to take a look at what motivates others.

So even if we can live with a messy desk, if we know the manager is inspired to see an ordered workspace, then we can try to rise to that new standard. If it bothers our companion that we’re doing something else while he’s talking about a serious issue, then we need to stop and sit down, and give our undivided attention. If it makes a difference to our mom that we check the stove one more time before we leave the kitchen, then we make her feel cared for, and can do it again.

 

gray kettle on range stove

 

These are the small and important ways that we can let someone know they are important to us.

It’s the Substance of what builds or breaks down any relationship.

Many of us have felt that overwhelmingly warm feeling when someone does something for us… It specifically hits our hearts. “Ah…how grateful I am that they took out the recycling! I love an ordered home…” It’s something that puts you at peace. And that positive energy allows you to give more.

 

brown wooden panel with white heart

 

“What’s Important to You is Important to Me.”

What a beautiful way to live…


Fig¹. Aman Shrivastava on Unsplash  Fig². Brooke Cagle on Unsplash  Fig³. Michael Browning on Unsplash  Fig⁴. Jamez Picard on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “All the Other Things We Think Make Us Happy Are Actually Just Ways of Getting More Family and Friends.” – Daniel Todd Gilbert

 

“We are happy when we have family, we are happy when we have friends and almost all the other things we think make us happy are actually just ways of getting more family and friends.”

– Daniel Todd Gilbert

 

Woman Falling In Line Holding Each Other

 

Let’s be grateful for all the happiness in our lives today. To truly cherish family, call a long-lost friend, or spend less time on work — and more time on someone.  

All the ‘someones’ in our lives are what give us joy. Appreciate!

Love,

Pamela

 


Daniel Todd Gilbert (born November 5, 1957) is Professor of Psychology at Harvard University. He is a social psychologist known for his research (with Timothy Wilson of the University of Virginia) on affective forecasting, with a special emphasis on cognitive biases such as the impact bias. Gilbert authored Stumbling on Happiness, which won the 2007 Royal Society Prizes for Science Books, adding to his list of numerous awards for his teaching and research. A high school dropout at age 19, he aspired to be a science fiction writer but when a creative writing class he wanted to take was full he took up psychology instead at University of Colorado Denver and Princeton University. He also wrote essays that appeared in The New York Times and TIME, among others, and penned short stories that were published in Amazing Stories, Isaac Asimov’s Science Fiction Magazine and many other magazines and anthologies. He is the co-writer and host of the NOVA television series This Emotional Life. He and his wife Marilynn Oliphant live in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

Bio Source: Wikipedia


Fig¹.  Photo by mentatdgt on Pixeles 

The Classic Pamela Positive: “What’s Important to You Is Important to Me”

 

“What’s Important To You Is Important To Me”

 

grayscale photography of two boys hugging while laughing

 

This is one of my favorite statements. It helps me understand and sincerely care about others. When we truly listen to our family, friends, partners, team mates, improv players, then we can really hear…what’s important.

Sometimes it might be a clean kitchen. For others, it might be taking the dog for a walk or getting the car cleaned. Or it might be that you showed up at your daughter’s gymnastics recital. And sometimes, sitting down and listening to your boyfriend, while not multitasking and cleaning the dishes at the same time, maybe the biggest sign of attention. It can even be as small as keeping your desk clean at work because you know it inspires your manager.

 

men's gray button-up shirt

 

The point is, we all fall into habits. These habits are what are most comfortable, and convenient, for us. They are our priorities. But they are not necessarily important to others. Instead, we need to take a look at what motivates others.

So even if we can live with a messy desk, if we know the manager is inspired to see an ordered workspace, then we can try to rise to that new standard. If it bothers our companion that we’re doing something else while he’s talking about a serious issue, then we need to stop and sit down, and give our undivided attention. If it makes a difference to our mom that we check the stove one more time before we leave the kitchen, then we make her feel cared for, and can do it again.

 

gray kettle on range stove

 

These are the small and important ways that we can let someone know they are important to us.

It’s the Substance of what builds or breaks down any relationship.

Many of us have felt that overwhelmingly warm feeling when someone does something for us… It specifically hits our hearts. “Ah…how grateful I am that they took out the recycling! I love an ordered home…” It’s something that puts you at peace. And that positive energy allows you to give more.

 

brown wooden panel with white heart

 

“What’s Important to You is Important to Me.”

What a beautiful way to live…


Fig¹. Aman Shrivastava on Unsplash  Fig². Brooke Cagle on Unsplash
Fig³. Michael Browning on Unsplash  Fig⁴. Jamez Picard on Unsplash

The Classic Pamela Positive: “All the Other Things We Think Make Us Happy Are Actually Just Ways of Getting More Family and Friends.”

 

“We are happy when we have family, we are happy when we have friends and almost all the other things we think make us happy are actually just ways of getting more family and friends.”

 

– Daniel Todd Gilbert, psychologist

 

jump-628431_640

 

 

Let’s be grateful for all the happiness in our lives today. To truly cherish family, call a long-lost friend, or spend less time on work — and more time on someone.  

All the ‘someones’ in our lives are what give us joy. Appreciate!

Love,

Pamela

 


 

Daniel Todd Gilbert (born November 5, 1957) is Professor of Psychology at Harvard University. He is a social psychologist known for his research (with Timothy Wilson of the University of Virginia) on affective forecasting, with a special emphasis on cognitive biases such as the impact bias. Gilbert authored Stumbling on Happiness, which won the 2007 Royal Society Prizes for Science Books, adding to his list of numerous awards for his teaching and research.  A high school dropout at age 19, he aspired to be a science fiction writer but when a creative writing class he wanted to take was full he took up psychology instead at University of Colorado Denver and Princeton University.  He also wrote essays that appeared in The New York Times and TIME, among others, and penned short stories that were published in Amazing Stories, Isaac Asimov’s Science Fiction Magazine and many other magazines and anthologies. He is the co-writer and host of the NOVA television series “This Emotional Life.”  He and his wife Marilynn Oliphant live in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

Bio source: Wikipedia: Daniel Gilbert (psychologist)

The Classic Pamela Positive: “What’s Important to You Is Important to Me”

 

Pamela’s Favorite…Pamela Positive

 

“What’s Important To You Is Important To Me”

 

 

girls-470679_640

 

 

This is one of my favorite statements.  It helps me understand and sincerely care about others.  When we truly listen to our family, friends, partners, team mates, improv players, then we can really hear…what’s important.

 

Sometimes it might be a clean kitchen.  For others, it might be taking the dog for a walk or getting the car cleaned.  Or it might be that you showed up at your daughter’s gymnastics recital. And sometimes, sitting down and listening to your boyfriend, while not multitasking and cleaning the dishes at the same time, may be the biggest sign of attention. It can even be as small as keeping your desk clean at work because you know it inspires your manager.

 

 

rawpixel-649910-unsplash.jpg

 

 

The point is, we all fall into habits.  These habits are what are most comfortable, and convenient, for us.  They are our priorities. But they are not necessarily important to others.  Instead, we need to take a look at what motivates others.

So even if we can live with a messy desk, if we know the manager is inspired to see an ordered workspace, then we can try to rise to that new standard.  If it bothers our companion that we’re doing something else while he’s talking about a serious issue, then we need to stop and sit down, and give our undivided attention.  If it makes a difference to our mom that we check the stove one more time before we leave the kitchen, then we make her feel cared for, and can do it again.

 

 

camylla-battani-794111-unsplash.jpg

 

 

These are the small and important ways that we can let someone know they are important to us.

It’s the Substance of what builds or breaks down any relationship.

Many of us have felt that overwhelmingly warm feeling when someone does something for us… It specifically hits our hearts.  “Ah…how grateful I am that they took out the recycling!  I love an ordered home…” It’s something that puts you at  peace. And that positive energy allows you to give more.

 

 

mel-poole-1088985-unsplash.jpg

 

 

“What’s Important to You is Important to Me.”

What a beautiful way to live…

The Classic Pamela Positive: “We Are Going To Get Through This”- Sheryl Sandberg

 

We are not going to say, “You are going to get through this”

but

We are going to get through this.”

 

“I learned the power of the word ‘we.’ Not saying to people, ‘You are going to get through this,’ but ‘We are going to get through this.’ That is such a different message, because it makes people feel less alone, and all of these forms of hardship, it’s not just the hardship itself but the isolation that comes with it. ‘We’ changes that.”

 

–       Sheryl Sandberg, Facebook COO, author, activist

 

What a beautiful quote from Sheryl Sandberg, who knows that hardships can’t be faced by themselves.

 

 

duy-pham-704498-unsplash.jpg

 

 

People face tough events, such as Sheryl Sandberg, and losing her spouse and partner.  But other people face hardships in a different way.1 Did you know that more than 72% of the population is lonely? This is leading to an epidemic of people having psychological problems and breakdowns by not having the bonds of community, love, and feeling cherished.

 

 

tyler-nix-525389-unsplash.jpg

 

 

All of us need to know that when we are facing a changing time, that we have someone by our side.

 

priscilla-du-preez-972638-unsplash (1).jpg

 

 

There’s someone to hold our hand.

 

desiree-fawn-68030-unsplash (1).jpg

 

You might be going through anxiety that makes your heart race and feel as if it’s going 20,000 beats per minute. Your husband might have just asked you for divorce. Your precious pet needs to get an operation. Or your son didn’t get into the elementary school that you’d hoped. Some of these may be major crises and some of these are “softer” crises, but they’re all things where we need a shoulder to shoulder approach.

Whose side can you stand by today?

Is there someone in your life who’s going through something that needs your help? Don’t let them go through it alone. Remember that we are going get through thisnot you are going to get through this.

 

Let’s do this together,

Pamela

 

*****

 

 

sandberg 1 (1)

 

 

Sheryl Sandberg is the chief operating officer (COO) of Facebook and founder women’s empowerment organization Lean In Foundation. She was born in Washington, D.C. and grew up in North Miami Beach, Florida. She was an exceptional student in high school, graduating top ten of her class and then went on to Harvard College. She studied economics at Harvard and graduated summa cum laude. She also received the John H. Williams Prize for top graduating student in economics. She would later attend Harvard Business School as well. Before moving to Facebook, Sandberg was vice president of global online sales and operations at Google, where she would help launch Google’s philanthropy program. In 2009, she was named one of the 25 most influential people on the web byBusiness Week. On their list of top 100 most powerful women in the world, Forbes has listed her as ninth in 2014 and fourth in 2017. She is a widow and she has two children.

 

 

Citations:
1 Lunardi, Stefano, “Feeling lonely? So are a lot of other people, survey finds”, CBS News, October 12, 2016, https://www.cbsnews.com/news/many-americans-are-lonely-survey-finds/
Fig. 1: Photo by Duy Pham on Unsplash
Fig. 2: Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash
Fig. 3: Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
Fig. 4: Photo by Desiree Fawn on Unsplash
Fig. 5: Photo by Unknown on Forbes

 

 

The Pamela Positive: “What’s Important to You Is Important to Me”

Pamela’s Favorite…Pamela Positive

“What’s Important To You Is Important To Me”

This is one of my favorite statements.  It helps me understand and sincerely care about others.  When we truly listen to our family, friends, partners, team mates, improv players, then we can really hear…what’s important.

Sometimes it might be a clean kitchen.  For others, it might be taking the dog for a walk or getting the car cleaned.  Or it might be that you showed up at your daughter’s gymnastics recital. And sometimes, sitting down and listening to your boyfriend, while not multitasking and cleaning the dishes at the same time, may be the biggest sign of attention. It can even be as small as keeping your desk clean at work because you know it inspires your manager.

The point is, we all fall into habits.  These habits are what are most comfortable, and convenient, for us.  They are our priorities. But they are not necessarily important to others.  Instead, we need to take a look at what motivates others.

So even if we can live with a messy desk, if we know the manager is inspired to see an ordered workspace, then we can try to rise to that new standard.  If it bothers our companion that we’re doing something else while he’s talking about a serious issue, then we need to stop and sit down, and give our undivided attention.  If it makes a difference to our mom that we check the stove one more time before you leave the kitchen, then we make her feel cared for, and can do it again.

These are the small and important ways that we can let someone know they are important to us.

It’s the Substance of what builds or breaks down any relationship.

Many of us have felt that overwhelmingly warm feeling when someone does something for us… It specifically hits our hearts.  “Ah…how grateful I am that they took out the recycling!  I love an ordered home…”  It’s something that puts you at  peace.  And that positive energy allows you to give more.

“What’s Important to You is Important to Me.”

What a beautiful way to live…